Whenever people receive a message from God, often from a heavenly visitor, their first response is that they were terrified! I admit I've seen my fair share of ghost movies (I'm really scared of ghosts more than anything, serial killers don't phase me. I mean all they really needed was some Jesus and a good friend....right?), and as soon as I get in my room by myself I can get a feel for the same fear these shepherds must have felt. But the messenger calms them down and tells them of a Liberator, a Savior is born. This spurs thought and conversations amongst the shepherds so they decide to go see in Bethlehem, and experience what the Lord has told them about. Don't forget that shepherds were humble and poor people who had little status in the world. Yet they were the first to be called to visit the Savior of the world, the great King. Sometimes I wish God would communicate with me through some kind of burning bush or a loud thunderous voice full of reverb, but that hasn't happened, I'm not saying it can't. But a lot of times I catch myself praying for God to give me direction, yet I don't seek his direction. Now that I reflect on that it feels like I'm trying to make God my servant. When I seek God whether through songs, art, reading, fellowship, or prayer, all I get is silence from God. Then this whisper saying "trust in me or not at all!" I am blown away, and overcome with thankfulness. But the more I think about it the more I think about what I really talk to God about. Most of its filled with the same old catch phrases. Do I mean them or do I just say them to make me feel better. Feels like sometimes I really don't mean them. Sometimes It seems like praying is like throwing a coin in a wishing well, and I'm deep down flooded with doubt, asking God for this and that, but not seeking and engaging who God is. In the end he is always faithful, and i'm looking fir what he will do next.