Saturday, May 31, 2008

The Loser Year

It's been a challenging year. I am very thankful for it though. I've realized success isn't always satisfying, and sometimes may leave you feeling emptier than you've ever been. I've realized taking the time and effort to build friendships is much more rewarding. To sit down and share someone else's loneliness, fears, hopes, and joys. I didn't always know the right advice but It's nice to have people to think things through and pray with. Failures: spending money wisely, caring, being thoughtful of my mom, calculus, service. I've discovered reading to be a new hobby, and definitely not a waste of time, or something that people say is lame because they associate it with being unsociable. I've realized I have idolized sports and academics and at times put them above God. It's a trend that seems impossible to fix, parents don't realize it, we force ourselves not to realize it because it feels too extreme and foolish, or crazy whats the difference? God has seemed really close and really far away at times but continues to be faithful, and continues to bless my family and I and I'm extremely thankful for that. New house, less stress on my mom, health, less bills, nicer neighbors, almost kind of a fresh start. What else.... oh credit cards are bad. I've overcome my deathly cat allergy and asthma. I have caught myself thinking what's the responsible thing to do which is new and good. hmm Girls... didn't really date anyone, blew some chances but oh well. I have met some awesome girls though and i admire them. I realized i'm more comfortable talking in a group of girls than guys, maybe cause thats all that i live with, but i still trip over words with the pretty ones. anyways some Goals: be more thoughtful of others, read the word more, write more, read more, learn how to play a shuffle on drums, exercise, figure out how the heck I'm paying for college.